Sometimes she feels faint, and the doctor says she lacks blood. Her glucose level is also low and she just eats candies and chocolates to keep it up. That worries me. She has also lost a lot of weight and is probably weighing only 45 kg now. I am worried. Is she stressed? Or is there something that is worrying her, keeping her awake, making her unhealthy. I know she has some frustrations with career and her job. And also that she has to study really hard for her CFA in a short while’s time. Hmm. Why do I get so worried for her? I mean, we have already talked it out. At least three times by now, and we have already decided that there will be no ‘us’. So why? Maybe I am worried just as a good friend? Because now that we have decided just to be good friends, even the time option thing has been discarded (lol…thinking back, the time option was a great joke) am I able to be satisfied ? Just being a good friend to someone you love is hard. But if you love someone, does that mean that you must own them? Is it enough if you know they are happy? Hmmm. Worrisome. But then again, maybe that should just be the case. History is filled with tragic love stories, and what can one say but to think that somewhere somehow, someone is sadder and has lost more? Because they do exist! Maybe one can hope and pray, but how long can one do that before realizing that it is just not feasible and that it is time to move on? I think that that is exactly one of the hardest lessons that I have to learn. How to move on. Because so many of us get stuck in our comfort zone, comfort country, comfort relationships…we have to learn to move on. That is hard for me, being someone who puts a lot into everything that I enjoy and love. But yes, it could be time to move on…..

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